Category : Word Perfect
Archive   : WP5MAC.ZIP
Filename : AFF.50
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COUNTY OF NEW YORK
ÒÆ ØÀ! Æ ÒÅ ÅÓ ÿ ÓÓ ÓÃÃÁ` 0 ÁÓ ÓÄÄ
Ó ÿ ÓBARTHOLOMEW BETELGEUSE,
Á ø ÁÁ P
ÁÁ ¨ ÁÁ ÁPlaintiff,
Áà Á©against©
ELMERELDA THERBLIG,
Á ø ÁÁ P
ÁÁ ¨ ÁÁ ÁDefendant.
Ó ÓÃÃÁ` 0 ÁÓ ÓÄÄÔ
È Ô
Index No. 88/92176
Å Å
PLAINTIFF'S AFFIDAVIT IN SUPPORT OF
MOTION FOR TRIAL BY
FIREÔ !
! Ô¯
STATE AND COUNTY OF NEW YORK, ss:
Ð ÐÁ ø ÁBARTHOLOMEW BETELGEUSE, being duly sworn, deposes and
says that:
Ð Ð
Ð ÐÁ ø ÁØ 1 Ø.Á P
ÁI am the plaintiff in this action, and a neighbor
of the defendant, Elmerelda Therblig, who lives three bays
down from my own quarters in the steam tunnels under Grand
Central Station, in the City, County and State of New York.
Ð Ð
Ð ÐÁ ø ÁØ 2 Ø.Á P
ÁIn June, 1987, on my complaint to the police,
defendant was arrested, tried, and convicted by a jury of
her peers as a common scold.
Ð Ð
Ð ÐÁ ø ÁØ 3 Ø.Á P
ÁDefendant had theretofore, daily and hourly,
harangued, pestered, screamed at, vilified, and subjected to
shrill contempt and contumely all her neighbors, including
me. Indeed, more than 40 people testified against her at
trial. ÃÃSeeÄÄ × CONVICT ×ÃÃPeople v. TherbligÄÄ, unreported, decision annexed
hereto as × ×à ÃExhibit A× ×Ä Ä. She was fined the sum of $50, whichÔ
°& Ôwas paid to the State, whereupon she was released to return
to her charac¬teristic scolding ways.
Ð Ð
Ð ÐÁ ø ÁØ 4 Ø.Á P
ÁOf all those subjected to her scolding, I suffered
the worst, for the two neighbors between her and me were
deaf.
Ð Ð
Ð ÐÁ ø ÁØ 5 Ø.Á P
ÁBy reason of her scolding, I was forced to leave
my accustomed quarters for nearly a month, taking a room at
the Plaza Hotel on 59th Street in Manhattan, occasioning
expense and damage in the amount of $3,567.92. The receipts
from the Plaza are × ×à ÃExhibit B× ×Ä Ä hereto.
Ð Ð
Ð ÐÁ ø ÁØ 6 Ø.Á P
ÁEven there I was not safe, for she nailed to the
Plaza's door a vengeful screed, detailing my real and imagined character defects. × ×à ÃExhibit C× ×Ä Ä hereto. It was at that
point I complained to the police.
Ð Ð
Ð ÐÁ ø ÁØ 7 Ø.Á P
ÁI have therefore brought this action to recover
from defendant the damages caused me by the continuing
nuisance of her scolding. I am not satisfied with trial by
a jury of her peers. Where would they be found? It took
nearly a month to pick a jury for her criminal charges, and
then the prosecutor finally accepted any juror to which the
defense had no objection.
Ð Ð
Ð ÐÁ ø ÁØ 8 Ø.Á P
Á× ECONOMY ×I am not a rich man. I cannot to pay my attorney
to spend a month picking jury before the trial even begins,Ô
H& Ômuch less to sit through a three©week trial while counsel
object to what each says to that jury. A copy of my only
bank book is × ×à ÃExhibit D× ×Ä Ä hereto; ÃÃsee alsoÄÄ my short©form federal income tax return for 1987, × ×à ÃExhibit E× ×Ä Ä hereto. I am
advised by counsel that I have a right to request trial by
alternate, and certainly more efficient, means.
Ð Ð
Ð ÐÁ ø ÁWHEREFORE, in the interests of judicial economy and my
own, I request that this case be marked down for trial by
fire in the January term, and that this Court grant me such
other and further relief as to this Court deems just, including costs of this motion.
Ð ÐÁ ø ÁÁ P
ÁÁ ¨ ÁÁ ÁÁ X% ÁÁ % °* ÁÓ ÓÃÃÁ`* À!H ÁÓ ÓÄÄ
Á ø ÁÁ P
ÁÁ ¨ ÁÁ ÁÁ X% ÁÁ % °* ÁBartholomew Betelgeuse
Sworn to before me this
___ day of May, 1988.
________________________
Notary Public
Ô
X Ô Ð
È È
ÐÁà °" ÁLIST OF EXHIBITS
ÂX ø ÂÂX P
ÂPage numbers record first mention of
each exhibit in this affidavit.ÆP
Æ
À,À×
×ÂX
ø ÂÁ ÁÃ ÃExhibit BÄ ÄÆhøÆÁp À!E Á 2
ÂX ø ÂÁ ÁÃ ÃExhibit AÄ ÄÆhøÆÁp À!E Á 1
ÂX ø ÂÁ ÁÃ ÃExhibit CÄ ÄÆhøÆÁp À!E Á 2
ÂX ø ÂÁ ÁÃ ÃExhibit EÄ ÄÆhøÆÁp À!E Á 3
ÂX ø ÂÁ ÁÃ ÃExhibit DÄ ÄÆhøÆÁp À!E Á 3
À,À
Very nice! Thank you for this wonderful archive. I wonder why I found it only now. Long live the BBS file archives!
This is so awesome! 😀 I’d be cool if you could download an entire archive of this at once, though.
But one thing that puzzles me is the “mtswslnkmcjklsdlsbdmMICROSOFT” string. There is an article about it here. It is definitely worth a read: http://www.os2museum.com/wp/mtswslnk/