Contents of the QUICHE.TXT file
=============== REAL PROGRAMMERS DON'T EAT QUICHE ===============
The following was seen on a bulletin board at Mobil Oil Corp. It then
traveled to the New Jersey IBM PC Club Newsletter. The PC Professional
Users Group in Wilmington, Deleware picked it up from there. Nick
Cvetkovic, a member of the PC Professional Users Group, got a copy, and
mailed it to me. From there, it was put on the board. So, with that
brief pause to give credit to the many people responsible to passing
this informative literature on, with no further introduction, here is
REAL PROGRAMMERS DON'T EAT QUICHE.........
Real programmers don't write specs--users should consider themselves lucky
to get any programs at all and take what they get.
Real programmers don't comment their code. If it was hard to write, it
should be hard to understand.
Real programmers don't write applications programs; they program right down
to the bare metal. Application programming is for feebs who can't do systems
Real programmers don't eat quiche. In fact, real programmers don't know how
to SPELL quiche. They eat Twinkies and Szechwan food.
Real programmers don't write in COBOL.
Real programmers' programs don't work right the first time. But if you throw
them on a machine they can be patched into working after "only a few" 30-hour
Real programmers don't write in FORTRAN. FORTRAN is for pipe stress freaks
and crystallography weenies.
Real programmers don't work 9 to 5. If any real programmers are around at
9 a.m., it's because they were up all night.
Real programmers don't write in BASIC. Actually no programmers write in
BASIC after the (mental) age of 12.
Real programmers don't write in PL/1. PL/1 is for programmers who can't
decide whether to write in COBOL or FORTRAN.
Real programmers don't play tennis or any other sport that requires you to
change clothes. Mountain climbing is OK, and real programmers wear their
climbing boots to work.
Real programmers don't document. Documentation is for simpletons who can't
read the listings or the object deck.
Real programmers don't write in PASCAL, or BLISS, or ADA, or any of those
pinko computer science languages. Strong typing is for people with weak
With this short description, how do you classify yourself ??? Are you a
REAL PROGRAMMER ???