Category : Various Text files
Archive : LOSTMONT.ZIP
Filename : MELLISH.FLY
Output of file : MELLISH.FLY contained in archive : LOSTMONT.ZIP
**** From "Monty Python's Flying Circus" and ****
**** "And Now for Something Completely Different" ****
**** Transcribed by Dave Bregman (FAC1037@UOFT01) ****
Ralph Mellish
June the 4th, 1973, was much like any other summer's day in Peterborough,
and Ralph Mellish, a file clerk at an insurance company, was on his way
to work as usual when ---
Scarcely able to believe his eyes, Ralph Mellish looked down. But one
glance confirmed his suspicions. Behind a bush, on the side of the road,
there was *no* severed arm. No dismembered trunk of a man in his late
fifties. No head in a bag. Nothing. Not a sausage. For Ralph Mellish,
this was *not* to be the start of any trail of events which would not, in
no time at all, involve him in neither a tangled knot of suspicion, nor
any web of lies, which would, had he been not involved, surely have led
him to no other place, than the central criminal court of the Old Bailey.
But it was not to be
office in Dulls-ells Street in Peterborough, at 9:05 a.m., exactly the
same time as he usually got in!
"Morning, Mr. Mellish"
"Morning, Enid"
Enid, a sharp-eyed, clever young girl, who had been with the firm for only 4
weeks, couldn't help noticing the complete absence of tiny but tell-tale blood
stains on Mr. Mellish's clothing. Nor did she notice anything strange in Mr.
Mellish's behaviour that whole morning. Nor the next morning. Nor at any time
before or since the entire period she worked for that firm.
"Have the new paper clips arrived, Enid?"
"Yes, they're over there, Mr. Mellish."
But for the lack of any untold circumstances for this secretary to
notice, and the total non-involvement of Mr. Mellish in anything illegal,
the forweight of the law would insure that Ralph Aulds Mellish would
have ended up like all who challenge the fundamental laws of our society.
In an iron coffin with spikes on the inside.
Very nice! Thank you for this wonderful archive. I wonder why I found it only now. Long live the BBS file archives!
This is so awesome! 😀 I’d be cool if you could download an entire archive of this at once, though.
But one thing that puzzles me is the “mtswslnkmcjklsdlsbdmMICROSOFT” string. There is an article about it here. It is definitely worth a read: http://www.os2museum.com/wp/mtswslnk/