Dec 182017
 
Toilet paper crisis shocks the nation.
File INSANITY.ZIP from The Programmer’s Corner in
Category Various Text files
Toilet paper crisis shocks the nation.
File Name File Size Zip Size Zip Type
INSANITY.TXT 4864 2449 deflated

Download File INSANITY.ZIP Here

Contents of the INSANITY.TXT file


I TOILE PAPE RUN OUT...
B Joh Crane
Th Bristo (Conn. Press
Editor' note Th curren toile pape buyin pani i
Bristo an othe citie i phenomeno tha i difficul t
explain Stor owner repor ther i n shortag o toile
pape bu i peopl continu t stoc u fo a imagine futur
crisis the coul i fac creat shortage a leas
temporarily I suc shortag di develop a i ha i th
energ field newspaper migh b carryin storie suc a th
following
WASHINGTO - Presiden Reaga toda name hi Tissu Cza i
hastil calle pres conferenc a th Whit House Reagan'
choic fo th critica positio i Josep Simple 33-year-ol
septi tan exper fro Martha' Vinyard Mass Th Presiden
sai th federa governmen woul d it par durin th tissu
crunch H sai h ha alread ordere al toilet padlocke a
th Capito Pres Buildin an beginnin Monda al federa
employee wil b limite t eigh square o singl pl toile
pape eac workin day Th Presiden als aske fo
voluntar closin o al publi res room o Sundays H sai
h wil orde suc closing i th futur i Congres passe
bil no pending.
WASHINGTO - Ne Tissu Cza Josep Simpl sai toda th
Administratio woul begi toile pape rationin onl a las
resort However Simpl di admi contingenc pla ha bee
prepare fo rationin an h ha ordere th printin o five-
yea suppl o ratio coupons.
Source clos t th Whit Hous indicat th pla wil allo
a averag famil o fou abou seve roll o toile pape
month Adjustment wil b mad a th situatio demands Fo
example familie wit hig incidenc o diarrhe can wit
verifyin statemen fro thei physician appl fo additiona
coupons.
NE YOR - A estimate 9 pe cen o th nation' res
room close voluntaril toda i th nation' firs tissueles
Sunday Thos wh disregarde th Presidentia reques an
staye open reporte lon line an wait o thre t fou
hours.
Moto club aroun th countr wer floode wit call askin
fo informatio o ope res rooms Stat polic reporte n
majo disturbance althoug ther wa som pani a res roo
alon th Ne Yor Stat Thruwa whe toile becam clogged.
On enterprisin restauran owne i Fargo Nort Dakota wa
offerin fre file migno an $1 charg fo usin th res
rooms.
NE YOR - Basebal Commissione Bowi Kuh announce toda
tha majo leagu basebal woul d it par t eas th curren
toile pape crisis Kuh sai tha al gam program woul b
printe o non-abrasiv pape an toilet woul b ope onl
durin pitchin changes.
LONDO - Polic reporte toda tha th grandso o oi
billionair Hecto Joh Huf ha bee kidnapped ranso not
lef b th kidnapper demande 3. millio roll o toile
paper Polic refuse t disclos th dropof location bu i
wa believe t b th Colosseu i Rome.
Th kidnapper hav alread refuse Huff' offe o $
millio fo th retur o hi grandson Negotiation ar
continuing.
WASHINGTO - Tissu Cza Josep Simpl toda announce a
Administratio pla t exten nighttim b a additiona fiv
hour i th continuin effor t cu toile pape consumption.
I prepare statement Simpl said "Th Administratio
feel tha mos peopl don' us th toile whil sleeping
Therefore i w ca ge peopl t slee longe w fee w ca
significantl reduc th us o toile tissue."
Simpl sai tha onc Presiden Reaga sign th bil int
law darknes wil exten fro p.m t 1 a.m H sai thi
wil appl t bot winte an summer.
ELKHOME Indian - Thi quie Midwester tow becam th
firs i th natio t ru completel ou o toile pape Monday
Mayo Georg Power ha issue a urgen reques fo stat an federa ai an Governo Thoma Lou ha requeste th Federa
Governmen designat th tow disaste area.
preliminar pla t airdro 2 case o toile pape t
thi beleaguere tow wa cancelle becaus o th pani i migh
cause A officia o th Re Cros sai tha agenc i helples
t len assistance "W hav plent o blood, h said "bu no
rol o toile paper."
An s th resident o Elkhom mus swea i ou fo a
least another day.


 December 18, 2017  Add comments

Leave a Reply